For Child-Rearing Grandparents, Help Is at Hand Thanks to Duet & Thunderbirds
Patricia Taylor and her grandson Hiro.
By Frontdoors Staff
Patricia Taylor and her husband Dennis are the main care providers for their toddler grandson Hiroyuki (Hiro for short). A retired nurse, Patricia said that Hiro came into their care due to her daughter’s addiction to heroin.
Trying to be a parent to Hiro while his birth mom and dad provide input from afar can be challenging. The experience of being a full-time caregiver for her grandson the “hardest yet most wonderful experience” of her life, Patricia said.
“It [becoming a full-time caregiver to her grandson] is rewarding because watching him develop provides so much joy; it’s hard to put into words,” Patricia said. “It’s challenging because it’s hard to deal with his parents sometimes; sometimes I feel like I have to be the ‘bad guy’ because I’m the one who provides stability so I’m the one who also has to set limits and say no.”
Patricia found Duet: Partners In Health & Aging grandparent support groups after doing a quick search. “I felt like I was about to lose my mind; this is not how I envisioned my retirement,” she said. “Duet support groups have been a lifesaver; you’re in a room full of people who have ‘been there.'”
Patricia and her family make it to the grandfamily outings and also turn to Duet for other resources, like referrals, which can be useful as the pressure can definitely increase when raising a child at an older age, particularly financially. There are things to think about such as the extra expenses of school, and the added importance on things like life insurance, (Read more about that here). At the encouragement of other grandparents, Patricia is also supporting herself by making time for hobbies and other healthy outlets.
“As hard as it [being a grandfamily] is, I hope he’s able to stay with us,” she said about Hiro. “He’s a happy, healthy little boy, and I believe with us that he has a fighting chance of staying that way.”
More than 100,000 children in Arizona are being raised by their grandparents or other relatives, according to the U.S. census. Duet: Partners In Health & Aging helps grandparents raising grandkids through Valley-wide support groups, workshops, family activities, respite care, and information and referrals. Recently, Thunderbirds Charities provided Duet with a $10,000 grant to support their one-of-a-kind Grandparents Raising Grandchildren program.
“The grant from Thunderbird Charities will make such a huge impact to grandfamilies [grandparents and the children they are raising] facing numerous challenges,” said Patricia Dominguez, director of kinship care services for Duet. “Many of the families are in distress. Emotions are high and they’re confused as to what’s happening. Duet is that life-line to making sense of their situation and providing hope.”
By supporting grandparents raising grandchildren, Duet provides families with the tools they need to navigate an often-unexpected transition and helps to keep children out of foster care. The funds from the Thunderbirds Charities grant will support group family activities, respite care, and more. These social and cultural outings such as family picnics, visits to local attractions, and more, allow grandparents and grandchildren to know that they aren’t alone in their journeys.
“Duet is making a true difference in the lives of these special families, grandparents raising their grandchildren,” said Andy Markham, president of Thunderbirds Charities. “We’re happy to assist in their efforts to serve the grandfamilies in our community.”
